What Does Money Mean to You?

I recently moved from Florida to someplace in The South. It's a bit of a change, and I don't just mean the weather.

In Florida, I lived in South Florida for most of my life and attented a college prep school from 2nd grade through graduation. While I received a good education, I was also schooled a bit in life. It was unlike the education of life I would have received in a public school, as it tended towards the weathy, upper class side of life. I wasn't wealthy, I didn't fit into the Bass shoes that everyone else wore. Instead, I was a working class kid, wearing my penny loafers from Sears or JCPenny's (probably in the men's department, because I was insanely tall with big feet as well.) My dad worked in public safety, and my mom, much to my chagrin, worked at my school. Because of her, my tuition was half, and we could afford to send me there.

When I was in the 7th grade, I got into a fight with one of my good friends because she never could make a decision on her own The final straw that started it all was when she was trying to decide on what purse she wanted. I doubt it was Christmas or her birthday, she just wanted a new purse. She couldn't decide, poor girl, between a Liz Claiborne or a Dooney& Bourke. All the time we heard "Should I get a Liz, or a Dooney? a Liz.... or a Dooney?" I didn't realize at the time what kind of money we were talking about. One of my friends already had a DB purse, so it didn't seem far out of reach, but at the same time, I knew that I could barely afford an ESPRIT purse, and those were far cheaper than her choices. I don't remember what her decision ultimately was, probably a DB, but it helps to make this point. The same year I remember one of the most wealthy girls in our class (she had the first boy/girl party in our grade, at a NIGHT CLUB!) carrying a Louis Vuitton purse. (it was real, no doubt. This was 1990, the fakes hadn't become as abundant as today) I knew that her purse had to be more than the other two choices, but I had no idea that it was in the 500-800 dollar range! for a purse! for a 7th grader!!!!!

So I grew up around money. It wasn't something that was flaunted so much as just accepted, and the norm. When I got to college, I realized that things in the "real world" weren't quite as they seemed from my school days. I took a friend home with me for the weekend once, and she spent the entire time she was there commenting on how many BMWs, Porches and Mercedes there were on the roads. She wasn't poor, but where she grew up, people just didn't drive cars like that. As for me, I never noticed it until she pointed it out, because it was just the norm for me.

Not everyone was wealthy around me, that's for sure, but it wasn't until I moved here that I became suddenly aware of the difference between "old money" and "new money". Traditionally, "old money" is money that's inherited, passed down, through the generations. People are raised rich with "old money". "New money", well it's just as it sounds, people are new to it, they've won the lottery, or gotten rich quickly in some way. I never understood the difference in the way it affected people until I moved.

The people I knew growing up. Many of them were the traditional "old money" types. They inherited it, and at the same time, continued in a career that kept them in that lifestyle, doctor, lawyer, business type, etc. Some of them were newer to it, a first generation wealth, but it was also earned the hard way. There was no taking for granted what they had. They were rich, they knew it, but they didn't look down on the "little man"

But I've moved. This place is much different. The first difference is that the cost of living is way less than in S Fla. THat means you don't have to have nearly as much money to have a big house. I mean, my parents could sell their tiny 3 bedroom, 2 bath house in S Florida, and move up here and get a 5 bedroom, 3 1/2 bath, formal living room, formal dining room, den, basement and sunroom for the EXACT SAME AMOUNT. Pay cash, owe nothing. It would give the illusion that they had more money than they really did. And that's what people do here. They buy huge houses, and big cars, which give the illusion of money, but when in reality, they have none. Well, not none so much, but not as much as they would make it seem.

I met a couple the other day who just moved here from Florida who commented on the same exact thing. They don't have well paying jobs here, but their house was paid off in Florida, and when they moved, they were able to get more for their money. Now the people around them are looking down their noses at this couple b/c the exterior says "we're better than they are", when the reality is actually the opposite. The couple here is in far better shape than the family with the dad working and mom going to the spa while the nanny watches the kids. The family has a mortgage to pay on this huge house and is months away from bankrupcy, while the couple has the house paid off in full and can put money away, hence making them more wealthy in the end.

There are many people here who are new to the money they have, and because they can afford to live in a large house, they believe themselves to be wealthy, when in reality, that's not the case. There's a different attitude from them as well. It's almost comical and stereotypical, the snooty, wealthy woman, looking down on the working class. I work in retail, in a women's clothing store, and I can spot the different types right away. There are the "old money" types here and the new "new money". In fact, the same day i met the couple from Florida, I met a woman who was DEFINITELY "new money". She was buying over 300 dollars worth of clothes, and then applied for a credit card because we were giving 30% off. When she was approved, it was only for $500. She scoffed. She actually said, "I have a credit card with a $50,000 limit! Why are they only giving me $500??!?!? I don't want your card if that's all my limit is!" We had to explain to her that everyone starts off small, and the more you use it and pay it off, the more they'll increase your limit. So she agreed to put her clothes on the card and pay off $100 of it then. What we didn't tell her is that the highest we've seen is $700, so obviously her credit ain't so good. That's the other thing, the other clue. She can have a credit card with the highest limit, but if you don't pay it off, it don't mean squat.

We've got the "old money" in there as well. These are the women who don't bother to open a store credit card because they've got their American Express or some other type card that gives them sky miles that they put EVERYTHING on. Plus, they can afford to pay it off at the end of each month as well. So, in addition to spending money, having the money to pay off the credit, they're getting great vacations at the same time. It doesn't take much to make the money, but to keep it, and make it grow... you gotta be smart.

There's a girl I work with. She wants to be rich and snobby. But really, she's a poser too. She has all these "Prada" bags, but I'm sure they're fake. She says her daddy gives her $500 every time he sees her, but that's only a few times a year. She says he brings her the purses from Asia, which I'm sure he does, but that's where most of the fakes are made. The old money doesn't need the name brand labels on the outside to prove to the world. What she doesn't know is that I, too, could have those purses, if I wanted them, but I don't, they're ugly. And my daddy gives me at least $600 every single month. She still lives at home, why can't she afford to buy these things on her own? If I still lived at home, I know I would! But I don't need 'em. And I like my independance, 827 miles away from mommy!

Who's really "richer?" Can you tell?


it's all a matter of perception, kiddies.