depression is bad.

I'm getting depressed again.

Not that "oh, i'm so depressed because [college team of your choice] lost to [biggest rival]", but the serious depression that caused me to fail college classes and spend the entire day in bed.
The kind of depression that will let me sleep for days and not eat a thing, and then the next day eat like a crazy woman and stay up until 5 am. It's not a good thing.

I have medicine for it. And the medicine works. But at the same time, the meds only work if I take them. ANd I've stopped. A close friend asked me tonight why, and I have no real good reason. I just have. I think part of it is because I know when I run out of this 3 month supply, I have none left, and when I have none left, I have to go to a doctor, and in order to GO to a doctor, I have to FIND a doctor. That's my biggest problem. Dad gave me lists... I have to call. I don't like calling. I still don't like admitting that i have a problem.

My roommate just called to see how I was doing. that's nice. it doesn't make things better. but. nice.

Things are very passive aggressive here, that's not making life any easier.

I'll talk about that later.